my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
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