I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
