we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
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