I want to walk on stilts...naked
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
