For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
