how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
