i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
