is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Randomize