Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
