You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
