Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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