Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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