I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize