i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
All the doctor said was why
wow bdsm is so cute
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
