He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
