We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
