i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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