is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
