that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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