how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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