the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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