ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
