Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
