She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
