have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
