I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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