operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Is Oprah even human
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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