I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
