Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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