He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Randomize
