Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
too bad you live with your parents still
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
