The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
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