omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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