I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
