Having a random hookup so left but love u
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Randomize
