dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
