The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
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