Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Acid is not a monday night drug
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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