Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
my poor anus
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize