Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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