The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
