We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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