Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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