im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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