there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize