Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Randomize
