so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize