just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize