I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
