thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize