The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
